Why did you never post? - w4m
Reply to: pers-956522905@craigslist.orgDate: 2008-12-13, 11:11AM
I hate you, fuck'n titty bastard.
Don't get me wrong, I thought we had something too. I was walking through the plaza of campus and you ended up holding the door open for me. I smiled and nodded my thanks, and you curtly nodded your dark, shaggy head in return... well, I think it was dark and shaggy, you had your hood up and I could only see the back of your head. But nonetheless, I knew it then. I felt it. You were going to be my missed connection.
I was excited. I was eager. Being of a shyer personality, and averagely-plain looks, I was never really noticed. I always scrolled the missed connection page, hoping against hope that someone would mention the chunky girl in King Sooper's buying the quart of Ben&Jerry's, or the disheveled girl scratching her armpit in the sedan going north. They never happened. Not a single post could even be pretended to be me. But, it was different with you. You were going to be my breakthrough. You were going to propel my debut to anonymous posting fame.
I checked MC that night, scrolling through with bated breath. M4M, W4M, I saw you at this bar, You had a kid. None of those were for me. I felt a pang in my stomach, but I let it pass. I knew, you just had a busy night. You were at odds with your family, and had to work overtime to pay for your school as you weren't able to get loans due to your father's fabulous wealth. Your cat died. You had to do laundry. I know how it is. I forgave you.
However, the next day, still nothing pertaining to me. No "I held the door open for you. You were average looking, but polite. Tell me what I was wearing." No reply back of, "You were wearing a hoody. The hood was up so I wasn't certain if you had dark and shaggy hair." No reply-reply back of, "Gee, that's right. Want to get coffee?" No reply-reply-reply back of, "I hate coffee. Sorry I don't think this will work out." No reply-reply-reply-reply back of, "Wow, I hate coffee too. I was just being nice. I love you." No reply-reply-reply-reply-reply back of, "I love you, too. Vegas?" None of that happened. NONE OF IT.
I was getting worried. Maybe a bus hit you? Maybe you got probed by your roommate? Maybe your cat came back to life and zombified you? The possibilities were endless. I dialed PVH multiple times, just to hang up realizing the only thing I knew about you was you were wearing a hoody. I was starting to forget what colour the hoody even was. Black? Dark blue? Maybe a CSU green? I forgot colours were important in MC. Frantically I hit up MC again, scrolling up and down, clicking every option. Dear lord, were you dead?
I was getting desperate but I couldn't post my own W4M posting for you. I was too haughty for that. You were supposed to come to me. You were supposed to post your generic statement of lustful attraction FOR ME. But then you had to get hospitalized and ruined everything. I can't wait for you forever. They don't even have a vaccine for zombification. I had to move on. Couldn't you drag your sore, corpse-like body home and make one MC posting? Your lack of dedication appalled me. I began to hate you.
I scorned MC for awhile, my heart still broken over your fucking lack of commitment. I waited two whole days for you. TWO. 2! My life was wasted. I could've been playing GuildWars, reading generic shoujo, saving orphans in Tibet. Now those orphans are dead, because you didn't fucking post and I spent two days wasting my time. Good work, orphan killer. You get kicks and giggles from murdering orphans, you fucking psychopath.
I sent a request to medical research requesting they never find a cure for zombies, fucking shithole douchebag titty hoody man from the depths of orphan killing hell. Way to ruin my hope in MC.
...btw, to the young man who was loitering in front of King Soopers, wearing a grey and green jacket, who glanced at my entrance...I am waiting for your post next.
1 comment:
that shit aint real.
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